karen goddard goddardk@_.com
11:34 PM (12 minutes ago)
to me
Tim!
I feel some clarification is called for. I'm not writing for justification of your Dads phone call this evening. It's to set the record straight on some things. I'm an emotional mess right now. Therefore I'm not good on the phone and I'm better at journaling.
You're version of the visit in May has absolutely nothing to do with Amanda, Chris, Mike, or anyone other than me. The drama you bring with you when you enter this state is very evident. You know as well as any of the those listed above can vouch for the events that occurred the night you visited Dad in Karmanos Hospital. You know you smelled of alcohol and you were obviously stoned, I'm not that naïve. I decided that you would not be allowed to see your Dad in the condition he was in at that time if you couldn't be sober or straight. Maybe you have some hidden agenda, but I believe that your Dad deserved much more respect than what you had to offer him again. Therefore, you had a family meeting at your mothers house and it was decided you couldn't follow the simple rule that if you couldn't be sober, you wouldn't be allowed at the hospital. PERIOD. MY RULE. MY DECISION. That's exactly how the series of events went. You were then asked to leave because of the chaos you cause whenever your in town. PERIOD.
Too many bridges have been burned Tim, and your delusion that everything is fine in Tim's world when it comes to his relationships with his family have gotten out of control. The hurt and disappointment goes deep in all of our hearts and it is my hope and prayer that you would someday begin to heal those hurts and relationships that have been so deeply damaged. Starting with your Dad. He is very sick Tim. He's scared to death and it's getting harder to comfort him. My prayer everyday for him is that he finds some peace with this horrible thing he has taking over his body. Also, that he can feel the love from his children. He needs to be at peace so that his energy can be devoted to fighting this cancer.
You recently accused me of protecting your or being his mother and that you may need permission to see your dad. Well at this point in his life, I will do everything in my power to protect him of any stress, conflict or any more hurt that he shouldn't have to deal with at this time. I am doing my best to keep him from worry, but with the drama of you possibly coming in a few weeks, has stirred things up for this family again. Please know that I am doing everything I can to make things easy as possibly for your Dad.
I hope that through it all you understand what and why I feel the way the I do. You continue to try to prove to the entire family that you're something you're not, when we can all see through the persona. I would hope that you would truly take some time to reflect on yourself and begin to rebuild the broken bridges from years of pretending everything is fine.
Your visit is neither needed or required. If you feel you need to see your Dad for rebuilding some kind of relationship, that's completely up to you. It is certainly not needed to help me out of any kind of jam I may be in. Dad said to you on the phone tonight, we have a guy that is working on the jobs, I'm able to keep up with the house and yard work. Amanda helps me out a lot and I have Chris when I feel I need him.
The best thing you could do right now is to fix yourself and I'll keep you updated on your Dad. Look deep within yourself Tim and know that you are loved, but this family isn't in the business any longer of making sure that you are accommodated when you come into town.
I wont apologize for what I've written. If you're offended, then maybe there is some truth to what I've said. I feel sorry for you and the fact that life hasn't turned out the way you expected it to. Think on what we've all had to say about your visit. If you feel that it is still necessary to see your Dad. I'll make sure that that happens.
Karen
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